Signs of Love Bombing - 6 Must-Know Facts

Being in a new relationship can be giddy and exciting. You’ve met this amazing person and you’re excited to see where it leads. But, perhaps you feel like something isn’t quite right. You’re being put on a pedestal, showered with affection and given lavish gifts that somehow feel too much for a relationship that has barely begun. If this is the case you may be experiencing love bombing.

What Is Love Bombing?

Love bombing is a phrase used to describe over-the-top gestures, excessive affection and intense adoration early in a relationship. Someone constantly complimenting you, expressing their undying love, or buying you expensive gifts at the beginning of a relationship might seem lovely, but it may be a sign of manipulation and a relationship red flag. Unfortunately, if it seems too good to be true it probably is, and the gestures of love and affection may well be hiding a nastier side that will come to the fore once the initial love bombing phase is over.

Love bombing can be a deliberate tactic narcissistic individuals use to manipulate their latest supply. Drawing them in. Or, it can be an unconscious pattern of behavior. This may be the result of unresolved issues from previous relationships, or due to an insecure or avoidant attachment style.

Those with an anxious insecure attachment style may be guilty of love bombing a new partner in an attempt to secure the relationship. They fear they will be abandoned, and yet these intense displays early on in a relationship can in fact end up pushing the other person away.

Those with an avoidant attachment style may use love bombing to feel in control of the relationship and the level of affection. The problem comes when the other person starts to reciprocate as the level of intimacy can be overwhelming and lead to them pushing away or even ghosting the other person.

Love bombing can feel great, it’s nice to be showered with gifts and compliments and can certainly give the receiver a big confidence boost. However, it is important to be aware that love bombing can be a form of emotional abuse, and often the start of a cycle of emotional abuse that can have a serious and long-lasting impact. It is a manipulative tactic often used by narcissistic persons to form a bond quickly and is one of the red flags that can signal the start of an unhealthy relationship.

Examples Of Love Bombing

Examples of love bombing include excessive attention, inappropriate gifts, talking about introducing you to their family when you’ve only been out a few times, or saying I love you too early in the relationship.

Signs You May Be Being Love Bombed

There is nothing wrong with giving your partner attention and affection. In fact, this is part of a healthy relationship. But if a relationship feels like it's moving too fast, especially at the beginning this could be a sign of love bombing.

As mentioned, love bombing can be a manipulative tactic used in abusive relationships. If over-the-top gestures or displays of affection lead you to feel rushed or feel guilty, especially at the start of a relationship, then it is a good idea to take some time to check in with yourself as these are common signs of love bombing.

Key signs of love bombing also include lavish often inappropriate gifts, and commitments that are not in line with the stage you are in the relationship, such as moving in together after a matter of weeks.

One way to determine whether it is love bombing or genuine affection is to talk to the other person and ask them to slow things down. If they drop the intensity and give you the space you need without making you feel guilty this is a good sign. If they get angry or try to gaslight you into believing this is what you really want then this is a red flag that shouldn’t be ignored.

Being put on a pedestal and showered with gifts and adoration can be very seductive. But because love bombing is so intense it is also exhausting for the “bomber” and will typically only last for a matter of weeks.

If you are feeling anxious that you are being love-bombed, maybe because you recognize some of the key signs or have noticed other relationship red flags, the best advice would be to trust your gut and take a step back. Spend time away from the situation and talk to loved ones. A trusted friend or family member may be able to give you a more balanced perspective and help you see if the behavior you are experiencing could be indicative of an unhealthy relationship.

Why You Need To Know If You Are Being Love Bombed

Love bombing can be a major red flag. While some people seem to be able to quickly spot the signs others are much more likely to fall for this tactic. Typically empaths, people-pleasers, those who have previously been in abusive relationships and those who grew up in narcissistic households are all more vulnerable to this type of manipulation.

Knowing how to spot the signs of love bombing is important as love bombing can often be the starting point of abusive relationships and a recurring cycle of abuse. Once the initial honeymoon phase is over, which is typically only a matter of weeks or months, the person who was showering you with gifts and expressing their undying love will suddenly start to change.

Because love bombing is emotionally manipulative, once the person changes you’re left feeling confused and so in love with the person that it’s easy to stay in the relationship hoping that things will go back to the way they were. And sometimes, for brief periods it might. Once you’ve become attached the love bomber can then begin to control you and the relationship, they become unrecognizable from the person you first met, but if you try to leave the love-bombing cycle may start all over again.

What To Do If You Have Been Love Bombed

Experiencing love bombing or any other kind of control or manipulation in a relationship can leave you heartbroken, confused and in a place where it’s hard to trust people again. One of the best ways to heal is to seek therapy or other support to rebuild your heart and move forward.

Working on your own self-love and can you set healthy boundaries and create healthy and fulfilling relationships that last.