How to Live for Yourself in a Relationship
Being in a relationship is a beautiful, exciting thing. More than just making us feel giddy and giving us butterflies, relationships can actually alter us at a neurochemical level. According to a study published in Psychoneuroendocrinology, a high amount of oxytocin (commonly referred to as the love hormone) is found in the brain composition of new lovers.
While the release of oxytocin does wonders for our happiness levels when in a relationship, it can blind us to the point where we begin to neglect ourselves. Taking care of yourself while in a relationship is something that must not be forgotten, no matter how “addicted” we feel towards our partner. Not only do you owe it to yourself to practice selflove, but taking time to do so will also improve your relationship with your romantic partner.
Being Your Own Person in a Relationship
It is often said that, given enough time, two people in a relationship will morph together into one person. This refers to the fact that, when you spend a lot of time with someone, especially someone you care for, a lot of their personality traits begin to rub off on you. This behavior isn’t necessarily a bad thing and, for the most part, it is rather unavoidable.
Like everything in life, however, being your own person while in a relationship is all about balance. There's nothing wrong with spending time with your partner, adopting their mannerisms, and wanting to be with them often, but you also need to recognize when it’s time to step back a little.
Doing so benefits the relationship in multiple ways, such as:
Enhancing the quality of the time spent between you and your partner
Allowing yourself time for selfcare
Allowing you to set boundaries
Reducing the risk of neglecting yourself and your other loved ones
Allowing you to maintain your independence
Allowing you to stay true to yourself and your beliefs
Overall, being your own person in a relationship allows you to maintain your sense of self. Having a clear vision of who you are while you grow in life alongside your partner comes in handy during times when you need to do challenging things without their support. This benefits yourself and your partner because it allows for a more equal, healthy relationship in which co-dependency, distrust, and caregiver fatigue are non-existent.
How to Be Your Best Self in a Relationship
Taking care of yourself while in a relationship is an important part of personal growth. When you are in a good place mentally and emotionally, you are able to enjoy and appreciate your relationship a lot more. To be your best self while in a relationship, you need to take the time to practice selfcare.
Selfcare involves taking care of yourself in the physical, emotional, and mental sense. When you practice selfcare, you’ll be able to maintain your individualism while in the relationship, as well as stay focused and healthy enough to enjoy it to the fullest.
When it comes to basic physical selfcare, you should focus on:
Having a personal hygiene routine
Getting routine health checkups
Eating healthy
Exercising
When it comes to emotional selfcare, you should focus on:
Engaging in creative hobbies
Spending quality time with loved ones
Doing and seeing things that make you laugh
Taking the time to disengage from stressful situations
Last but not least, mental selfcare often involves:
Seeing a mental health professional
Opening up to your loved ones
Taking the time to process your emotions
Giving your emotions an outlet
These are only some of the things you can do to practice selfcare. It takes time to learn what works and what doesn’t, so don’t worry about feeling frustrated if you have trouble “getting it”.
The key to it all is selfcare and selflove. Focusing on yourself from time to time heals the heart and allows you to grow as a person. Being your best self is a personal journey, even when you have a supportive partner by your side.
How to Work on Yourself in a Relationship
It's very easy to lose yourself when in a relationship. As your world merges with that of another person, dealing with your personal problems becomes a lot more complicated as you open your heart and mind to your significant other.
Just because you’re in a relationship does not mean that you have to stop working on yourself. You can still work towards self-improvement without neglecting your lover. The idea that personal growth and self-improvement is a solitary path is a misguided one, as there is no better way to grow than by surrounding yourself with those who care about you dearly.
Working on yourself while in a relationship is all about setting boundaries. When you set boundaries, set certain rules that establish your agency in the relationship. These rules can be anything that helps you in developing selflove and keep a healthy balance between your independence and your place in the relationship.
Stay firm on your boundaries and communicate with your partner. These two things will make it incredibly easy to work on yourself while in a relationship.
Taking Care of Yourself in a Relationship
Treat yourself to some kindness while in a relationship. Take care of yourself and don’t be afraid to lean on your partner every now and then when things get rough. While selfcare is something that you mainly do by yourself for yourself, there’s nothing wrong with allowing your partner to care for you from time to time.
You should take care of yourself as much as your partner does. If you notice that this isn’t the case, you can check out Grit & Grace: 7 Steps to Survive Heartbreak. It’s a book that can be applied to many aspects of life, and it serves as guidance when you are struggling with feeling good about yourself.
How to Be Yourself in a Relationship
A happy relationship is one where both partners can be themselves in. Don't be afraid of being who you truly are around your partner. Honesty and truth are great foundations from which you can build a long-lasting relationship with your partner.
Allow yourself to unwind and speak your mind when in their presence, and don’t think too much about coming off as weird. We all have charming little quirks that make us who we are, so when you open yourself up, your partner will find you even more endearing.
